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        我是如何戒掉iPhone的

        2012-07-26 13:54

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        用了iPhone后,我隔三差五就想摸一下心愛(ài)的手機(jī),只要一離開(kāi)它就會(huì)感到驚慌失措,這些跡象表明:我患上了iPhone上癮癥……

        我是如何戒掉iPhone的

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        By Amy Green

        張凱蒂 選注

        My name is Amy. I’m a 25-year-old graduate student who likes yoga, home-decorating shows and eating spoonfuls of peanut butter straight from the jar.[2] Oh yeah, and I’m an iPhone addict.

        I wasn’t always an addict. In fact, for many years I told myself I didn’t want a fancy[3] cellphone. They seemed like too much work, always beeping[4], ringing and demanding attention. I was perfectly content with my simple antique[5], and I didn’t anticipate changing my mind any time soon.

        However, about a year ago, I found myself envious of all those proud iPhone owners, cradling their shiny new phones and showing them off to all their friends.[6] I started eavesdropping on conversations about “iPhone apps”,[7] feeling like a tourist listening to a language I couldn’t speak.

        Eventually I couldn’t ignore my iPhone instinct any longer, and I welcomed my new iPhone into my life. I instantly fell in love with the little bundle of joy, and could no longer imagine a life without it.

        To my surprise, I suddenly found myself with a whole new circle of friends—other iPhone owners I could go to for advice and support as I learned the various functions of my new device. They responded to my iPhone-related queries when my other friends couldn’t, and didn’t roll their eyes when I bragged about all the things little Eloise (yes, I named her) could do.[8]

        For a couple months I was living on iCloud nine[9] as I built my new life with Eloise. However, I realized I had a problem when one day I found myself Google-mapping[10] my way to my mailbox. Which happens to be right outside my front door.

        When I reflected upon[11] the past few months, I couldn’t believe I didn’t see this coming. All the warning signs were there. Eloise slept right beside me and was the first thing I reached for in the morning. I checked my e-mail about 20 times a day. I also experienced attachment anxiety when I left poor Eloise in the change room at the gym.[12] What if she beeped and needed my response? Or, even worse, what if a careless gym-goer knocked her out of my bag and caused her screen to (I hardly dared to imagine it) crack?[13]

        Okay, so I was addicted to my iPhone.

        Once I admitted I had a problem, things started to change. What used to feel like friendly notifications now felt like constant nagging to respond.[14] I hated that I could no longer leave the house without Eloise in my hand. Eventually, I resented Eloise so much I wanted to throw her at the wall—and would have, too, if I weren’t so worried about being reported for iPhone abuse.

        I decided something had to be done. But, as I quickly realized, iPhones are like cigarettes and not easy to quit.

        Then, while taking the bus to work one day, I was unexpectedly forced to quit—at least temporarily. When I reached into my purse to grab Eloise (to check my e-mail for only the seventh time that morning), I found her overcome by fever. She was so hot that I dropped her immediately back into my bag with barely enough time to comprehend the words “overheating” and “power-off” that flashed with angst[15] upon her screen. When I picked her up again, she was gone.

        My head swam with panic as I attempted to problem-solve without avail.[16] I couldn’t call anyone for advice. I couldn’t Google whether this had happened to any fellow iPhone parents. And when I finally arrived at work (luckily I found my office without Google maps to guide me), I learned that sick days do not apply to one’s iPhone children.

        The Apple Store was closed by the time I finished work, so I headed home with dread[17] into an Eloise-less night. But, after a couple hours without any text alerts, push notifications, or even good old-fashioned phone calls, I felt ... calmer. After a few more hours I felt like a whole new woman, rising above the need for a silly... what was it called again? It had been so long I could hardly remember.

        Without my electronic bed partner, I drifted off into the deepest slumber[18] I’d had in months. The next morning, I read the news from the simplicity of the newspaper, instead of from my iPhone. I even noticed the cherry blossoms blooming.[19]

        My goodness, what had I been missing?

        But although it went against my newly redefined principles, I made my way to the Apple Store later that afternoon after admitting I’d need a phone sooner or later.[20]

        Half an hour and one friendly Apple employee later, I found myself yet again the proud owner of a new iPhone. When I turned it on, a wave of familiarity washed over me as it buzzed with two days worth of missed texts and notifications.[21]

        As I rode home, I found myself frenziedly responding to messages of “where are u?” and “c u soon?”[22] Suddenly, I was reminded of an old Alanis Morissette song: “I’ve got one hand in my pocket, and the other one’s death-gripping an iPhone.”...[23]

        Without finishing my text, I put my phone back into my purse and decided to just enjoy the ride for a while.

        Vocabulary

        1. abuse: 濫用。

        2. yoga: 瑜伽;spoonful: 一匙之量。

        3. fancy: 高級(jí)的,奢華的。

        4. beep: 嘟嘟響。

        5. antique: 古董,此處用比喻義,指舊手機(jī)。

        6. envious: 妒忌的,羨慕的;cradle: 輕輕地抱著,此處用比喻義。

        7. eavesdrop: 偷聽(tīng)(別人的談話(huà));app: =application,應(yīng)用程序。

        8. query: 問(wèn)題,疑問(wèn);roll one's eyes: 翻白眼;brag about: 吹噓。

        9. be on cloud nine:〈口〉極為高興。此處形近字的用法很巧妙,iCloud是蘋(píng)果公司的云服務(wù),其功能是將存儲(chǔ)內(nèi)容,包括購(gòu)買(mǎi)的音樂(lè)、應(yīng)用、電子書(shū)等推送到用戶(hù)的所有蘋(píng)果設(shè)備。

        10. Google-map: v. 用Google在線(xiàn)地圖進(jìn)行搜索。

        11. Reflect upon: 仔細(xì)思考。

        12. attachment: 喜愛(ài),依戀;change room: 更衣室;gym: 健身房。

        13. knock out: 撞倒;crack:(使)破裂,(使)裂開(kāi)。

        14. notification: 通知;nagging: 嘮叨的。

        15. angst: 焦慮不安,煩惱。

        16. swim: 發(fā)昏,眩暈;without avail: 徒勞。

        17. dread: 恐懼。

        18. slumber: 睡眠。

        19. cherry blossom: 櫻花;bloom: 開(kāi)花。

        20. redefined: 重新定義的;sooner or later: 遲早。

        21. wash over:(感覺(jué))突然襲來(lái);buzz: 發(fā)嗡嗡聲,忙亂。

        22. frenziedly: 忙亂地,激動(dòng)地;c u soon: =see you soon的縮寫(xiě)。

        23. Alanis Morissette: 艾拉妮絲?莫莉塞特,加拿大搖滾女歌手;death-gripping: 緊緊握住。

        (來(lái)源:英語(yǔ)學(xué)習(xí)雜志 編輯:中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)網(wǎng)英語(yǔ)點(diǎn)津 陳丹妮)

         

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