行為乖戾的孩子往往不討人喜歡,然而人們可能沒(méi)有意識(shí)到,內(nèi)心最脆弱、最缺乏愛和溫情滋潤(rùn)的正是這樣的孩子。對(duì)他們多一點(diǎn)耐心,多付出一點(diǎn)關(guān)愛,也許,他們的一生會(huì)因你而改變……
By Pauline Burgard
穆陽(yáng) 選 胡曉凱 譯
After 20 years as a full-time wife and mother, I decided now that my kids were grown, I needed a part-time job to keep me busy. I decided to drive a school bus. Charlie began riding my bus in September of my fourth year driving. Eight years old, with blond hair and crystalline gray eyes, he got on with a group of children. They all had stories to tell me about their summers. Charlie, though, ignored me. He didn’t even answer when I asked his name. From that day on, Charlie was a trial. If a fight broke out I didn’t have to turn my head to know who had started it. If someone was throwing spitballs I could guess the culprit’s name. If a girl was crying, chances were Charlie had pulled her hair. No matter how I spoke to him, gently or firmly, he wouldn’t say a word. He’d just stare at me with those big gray eyes of his. I asked around some, and found out Charlie’s father was dead and he didn’t live with his mother. He deserves my patience, I thought. So I practiced every bit of patience I could muster. To my cheery “Good morning,” he was silent. When I wished him a happy Halloween, he sneered. Many, many times I asked myself how I could reach Charlie. “I’m at my wit’s end,” I’d say. Still I was sure that this child needed to feel some warmth from me. So, when he’d pass by, I’d ruffle his hair or pat him on the arm. Toward the end of that year, the kids on my bus gave me a small trophy inscribed “To the Best Bus Driver Ever”. I propped it up on the dashboard. On top I hung a small tin heart that a little girl had given me. In red paint she had written, “I love Polly and Polly loves me.” On the next-to-last day of school I was delayed a few minutes talking to the principal. When I got on the bus I realized that the tin heart was gone. “Does anyone know what happened to the little heart that was up here?” I asked. For once with 39 children, there was silence. One boy piped up, “Charlie was the first one on the bus. I bet he took it.” Other children joined the chorus, “Yeah! Charlie did it! Search him!” I asked Charlie, “Have you seen the heart?” “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he protested. Standing up, he took a few pennies and a small ball out of his pockets. “See, I don’t have it.” “I bet he does!” insisted the girl who had given me the heart. “Check his pockets.” Charlie glowered when I asked him to come forward. His gaze burned into mine. I stuck my hand into one pocket. Nothing. I reached into the other pocket. Then I felt it—the familiar outline of the small tin heart. Charlie stared at me for a long time. There were no tears in those big gray eyes, no plea for mercy. He seemed to be waiting for what he’d come to expect from the world. I was about to pull the tin heart out of Charlie’s pocket when I stopped myself. Let him keep it, a voice seemed to whisper. “It must have fallen off before I got here,” I said to the kids. “I’ll probably find it back at the bus depot.” Without a word, Charlie returned to his seat. When he got off at his stop, he didn’t so much as glance at me. That summer Charlie moved away... Eventually I retired. And there my story as a school bus driver ends, except for one more incident. A dozen years after retirement I was in a department store in Kansas City, when someone said tentatively, “Polly?” I turned to see a balding man who was approaching middle age. “Yes?” His face didn’t look familiar until I noticed his big gray eyes. There was no doubt. It was Charlie. He told me he was living in Montana and doing well. Then, to my surprise, he hugged me. After he let go, he pulled something from his pocket and held it up for me to see. An old key chain...bent out of shape, the lettering faded. You can probably guess what it was—the little tin heart that said, “I love Polly and Polly loves me.” “You were the only one who kept trying,” he explained. We hugged again, and went our separate ways. I am so happy I’d done a good job. |
過(guò)了20年全職主婦的生活后,我下定決心:既然孩子們都長(zhǎng)大了,我也需要做份兼職來(lái)打發(fā)時(shí)間。我決定去開校車。 查理開始坐我的車是在我兼職開車第四個(gè)年頭的九月份。他當(dāng)時(shí)8歲,金發(fā),灰色的眼睛清澈透亮,他跟一群孩子上了車。他們都有暑假故事和我分享。而查理卻對(duì)我視而不見。就連我問(wèn)他名字時(shí),他都沒(méi)有回答。 從那天起,查理就成了惹麻煩的家伙。如果有人打架,我不用回頭就知道是誰(shuí)挑起的。如果有人扔唾沫紙團(tuán),我能猜出罪魁禍?zhǔn)椎拿帧R怯信⒆涌蘖耍芸赡苁且驗(yàn)椴槔沓读怂念^發(fā)。不管我怎樣跟他說(shuō)話,溫和也好,嚴(yán)厲也罷,他就是一言不發(fā),只是用他那雙灰色的大眼睛盯著我。 后來(lái)我打聽到,查理的父親去世了,他也沒(méi)和媽媽住在一起。我想,我應(yīng)該對(duì)他耐心些。于是我便盡可能地拿出了所有的耐心。我愉快地跟他說(shuō)“早上好”,回應(yīng)我的卻是沉默。當(dāng)我祝他萬(wàn)圣節(jié)快樂(lè)時(shí),他則報(bào)以冷笑。不知有多少次,我問(wèn)自己怎樣才能打動(dòng)查理。我得說(shuō),“我已經(jīng)束手無(wú)策了”。但我依然確信這個(gè)孩子需要從我這里感受到一些溫暖。所以,每次他經(jīng)過(guò)時(shí),我都會(huì)揉亂他的頭發(fā),或是拍拍他的胳膊。 那年年末,校車上的孩子們送給我一個(gè)小紀(jì)念品,上面刻著“獻(xiàn)給最棒的校車司機(jī)”幾個(gè)字。我把它架在儀表板上。上面掛了一顆小錫心,是一個(gè)小女孩送給我的。她用紅筆寫道:“我愛波莉,波莉愛我。” 在學(xué)校放假的前兩天,我跟校長(zhǎng)談話耽擱了幾分鐘。等上了校車,卻發(fā)現(xiàn)小錫心不見了。“有誰(shuí)知道掛在這上面的小錫心哪兒去了嗎?”我問(wèn)道。只有這一次,39個(gè)孩子全都沉默了。 一個(gè)男孩尖聲說(shuō),“查理第一個(gè)上的校車。我敢說(shuō)是他拿的。”其他孩子也齊聲說(shuō)道,“沒(méi)錯(cuò)!是查理干的!搜他的身!” 我問(wèn)查理:“你見過(guò)那顆小錫心嗎?”“我不知道你在說(shuō)什么,”他抗議道。說(shuō)著他站起來(lái),從兜里掏出幾枚硬幣和一個(gè)小球,“看吧,我身上沒(méi)有那東西。”“我敢肯定就在他身上!”那個(gè)送我小錫心的女孩說(shuō),“檢查他的口袋”。 我讓查理走上前來(lái),他怒目而視。他那凝視的目光深深地烙印在我的眼中。我把手伸到他的一只口袋里,什么也沒(méi)有。然后我伸進(jìn)另一只口袋,摸到了它——那顆小錫心的熟悉輪廓。查理盯著我看了很長(zhǎng)時(shí)間。那雙灰色的大眼睛里沒(méi)有眼淚,也沒(méi)有對(duì)憐憫的乞求。他似乎正在等待著一個(gè)早已料到的結(jié)果。就在我要把小錫心從查理的口袋里拿出來(lái)的時(shí)候,我停住了。讓他留著吧,一個(gè)聲音似乎在輕輕地說(shuō)。 “一定是在我來(lái)這兒之前掉的,”我對(duì)孩子們說(shuō),“我或許能在車站把它找回來(lái)。”查理一言不發(fā)地回到了他的座位上。下車的時(shí)候,他甚至連看也沒(méi)看我一眼。那年夏天,查理搬走了…… 后來(lái)我退休了,當(dāng)校車司機(jī)的故事也隨之結(jié)束,直到后來(lái)又發(fā)生了一件事。退休12年后,在堪薩斯城的一家百貨商店里,有人遲疑地叫我,“波莉?”我回過(guò)頭,看到一個(gè)已近中年、有些謝頂?shù)哪腥恕!澳闶牵俊薄K哪樋雌饋?lái)并不眼熟,直到我注意到他那雙灰色的大眼睛。不用懷疑,他就是查理。 他告訴我,他現(xiàn)在住在蒙大拿州,過(guò)得很好。然后,讓我吃驚的是,他擁抱了我。放開我后,他從口袋里拿出了一樣?xùn)|西,舉起來(lái)讓我看。那是一個(gè)很舊的鑰匙鏈……已經(jīng)彎曲變形,上邊的字也模糊褪色了。你可能已經(jīng)猜到它是什么了——就是那顆上面寫著“我愛波莉,波莉愛我”的小錫心。 “你是唯一一個(gè)沒(méi)有放棄我的人,”他解釋道。我們?cè)俅螕肀?duì)方,然后各自分別了。我很高興自己做了這樣一件好事。 (來(lái)源:英語(yǔ)學(xué)習(xí)雜志) |
Vocabulary: 1. crystalline:(水晶般)清澈透明的,晶瑩的。 2. trial: 惹麻煩的人(或東西),令人討厭的人(或東西)。 3. spitball: 小孩用唾沫弄濕后用作拋投物的紙團(tuán)。 4. culprit: 導(dǎo)致過(guò)錯(cuò)的人。 5. ask around: 〈美〉各處詢問(wèn)。 6. muster: 激起(感情等)。 7. Halloween:(基督教)萬(wàn)圣節(jié)前夕(即10月31日之夜)。 8. at one’s wit’s end: 智窮計(jì)盡,束手無(wú)策。 9. ruffle: 弄亂(頭發(fā)等)。 10. pat: 輕拍……以示愛撫(或贊賞、安慰等)。 11. prop up: 架,擱。 12. dashboard: (汽車等上的)儀表板。 13. pipe up: (尖聲地)說(shuō),講話。 14. chorus: 齊聲,異口同聲。 15. glower: 怒目而視,沉著臉。 16. burn into: (使)深印于。 17. bus depot: 〈美〉公共汽車站。 18. so much as: =even,甚至。 19. tentatively: 猶豫地,遲疑不決地。 20. balding: 在脫發(fā)的,變禿的。 21. approach: 靠近,接近。 22. out of shape: 變形的,走樣的。 23. lettering: [總稱](寫或刻印的)字。 24. fade: (顏色)褪去。 |