如何寫(xiě)說(shuō)服客戶改變主意的信件？按照下面的步驟，您就可以輕松搞定。
Difficult Letter #1: Persuading a Customer
THE SITUATION
An HSBC customer in Thailand has
decided to purchase a new car. As a result, he has requested an increase in his
overdraft facility to pay for the new car.
HSBC, however, prefers its customers to use car loans
when purchasing new cars. A loan allows customers to pay for the car over a
longer period of time. The repayment schedule gives customers a clear picture of
their financial commitments for the period of the loan. In addition,
a loan enables customers to use their overdraft facility to meet unexpected
expenses.
Your colleague has drafted a letter to persuade the
customer to apply for a car loan.
THE FIRST DRAFT
Evaluate the tone of the first draft below.
|
21 October 200X
S
Khomson
6/F 324 Phayathai Road
Bangkok
Dear Mr Khomson
Thank you for your letter requesting an increase in
your overdraft facility.
We, however, do not recommend using your overdraft
facility to purchase a new car. Therefore, we suggest that you apply for a
car loan instead.
I have enclosed a brochure on car
loans.
Please read the brochure and complete the
application form. As soon as I receive your application, I will help you
process the loan.
I look forward to hearing from
you.
Yours
sincerely |
What do you think of the tone of this
letter?
Write your comments on a piece of paper. Then, compare
your comments with the evaluation below.
THE FIRST DRAFT – EVALUATION
The letter is quite courteous. The writer has used
appropriate strategies for writing polite, positive and personal
sentences.
However, the writer has been too direct. The writer
assumes that the customer will accept the suggestion. But the reader - the
customer - has already indicated what he wants to do. So he may resist the
suggestion.
How, then, can you get the customer to agree with your
suggestion?
IMPROVING THE DRAFT
How could you improve the draft?
Write your ideas on a piece of paper. Then compare your
ideas with the suggestions.
|
The writer's first sentence is quite pleasant. However, you could add a sentence to
compliment the customer. For example:
"I have enjoyed
serving you over the past five years."
Before making a suggestion, you need to provide
some background. You need to state the reasons for the suggestion first.
If possible, you should also state how your suggestion can benefit the
customer.
Then, you can make your
suggestion.
Finally, you should close the letter positively.
You should also offer your help if the customer agrees with your
suggestion. |
IMPROVING THE DRAFT - APPROPRIATE PATTERN
How do you structure the contents when you need to
persuade a customer to accept your suggestion?
In the table below, the pattern for writing to persuade a
customer is incomplete. You need to complete it.
Pattern for persuading a customer to accept your
suggestion
1) Pleasant introduction,
complimenting the customer
2)
3)
4) Polite close, with offer of help
Keys:
2) Reasons for / benefits of the
suggestion
3) Suggestion
REVISING THE DRAFT
Now try revising the draft prepared by your
colleague.
To do this, you will need
l
the draft
prepared by your colleague
l
the
appropriate pattern for persuading a customer to accept a suggestion
l
information
about the benefits of a car loan
l
a pen and a
piece of paper.
REVISING THE DRAFT – EXAMPLE
|
21 October 200X
S
Khomson
6/F 324 Phayathai Road
Bangkok
Dear Mr Khomson
Thank you for your letter requesting an increase in
your overdraft facility. I have always enjoyed assisting you manage your
finances over the years.
Purchasing a new car is a significant investment.
An HSBC car loan allows you to pay for your new car over a longer period
of time. In addition, whatever repayment schedule you choose provides you
with a clear picture of your financial
commitments for the whole period. At the same time, you can still use your
overdraft facility to meet any unexpected expenses.
Therefore, I suggest that you apply for a car loan
when you purchase your new car. I have enclosed a brochure which provides
additional information.
Mr Khomson, I urge you to consider this suggestion.
I believe you will find a car loan the most convenient way to meet all of
your expenses, both budgeted and unexpected. Please call me on 217 9876 so
that we can discuss the terms in detail.
I look forward to hearing from
you.
Yours
sincerely |
下一節(jié)我們將學(xué)習(xí)如何寫(xiě) refusing requests 的信件。
（來(lái)源：中國(guó)物流論壇
實(shí)習(xí)生江巍
英語(yǔ)點(diǎn)津
Annabel 編輯）
我要學(xué)習(xí)更多商務(wù)英語(yǔ)
